GORUCK Take 2: Never Quit and Have No Regrets

My second GORUCK Challenge is now in the books.  St. Patrick's Day Custom Challenge Class 936 to support the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  I have so many thoughts I'm not sure where to start. Each GRC is different and each class is special.  For me, each experience teaches different lessons, or to be more specific takes lessons I've learned before in life and drives them home.  For my first challenge, GRC 792 those lessons were "Winning hearts and minds" and "It can always be worse". You can read about that here...  For this class, GRC 936 the lessons were "Never Quit" and "Live life with no regrets".  More on those later.

If you're a regular reader, you'll remember that two of my kids, Logan and Julianne were coming to shadow this.  I agreed to get them to Chicago if they raised at least $150 each for LLS.  If you're a new reader feel free to get caught up about that here...  Between the three of us, we managed to raise over $500 for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society above and beyond the registration fee.  It was a great experience to have them there shadowing, and they were both rock stars!  They pushed through the cold, the sleepless night, all the miles, always willing to do anything they were asked, and all the while watching the challenge class and learning that they are stronger than they ever thought they were.  I was incredibly proud of them both,  especially when Cadre John aka "Big Daddy" presented them with GORUCK Shadow Company patches I had bought them.

Logan and Julianne after the Challenge

GRC 936 started at the Chicago Fire Academy at 1:00 am with a start temperature of about 33 degrees, and it only got colder from there dropping down to about 26 just before dawn.  As is custom, I won't talk a lot about what this Challenge entailed, except to say Big Daddy brought the pain.  I have a new respect for four count flutter kicks, concrete parking stops are HEAVY, goose poop and freezing mud is not fun to play in, and I've never before had the chance to low crawl and roll around in snow and sand back to back.  Good Livin'!

This class as a whole inspired me, but there are a few people who stand out.  I won't mention any names, but if you read this, and you'd like to take credit for your inspiration, please comment down below.

To the woman who almost quit early on and didn't: We've all been there and felt what you felt.  That you dug deep and gutted it out and ended up suffering the pain of Big Daddy instead the pain of regret was amazing.  You reminded me that we have to get outside of our comfort zone to make the magic happen.  You did it.  You never quit, and you're GRT.

To my fellow over 40 GORUCK "master":  Thanks for being there.  I often feel old in situations like this, and wonder why I push my 44 year old body to the limit.  You reminded me it's because I can.  "To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift." Let's keep leading the way for the younger generation.

To the woman in her 20's that carried me in the parade (literally carried me):  You give me hope for the future,  we often hear discouraging things about the "millenials", but if you are any indication there's nothing to worry about.  Strong in body and mind, you make others want to be like you. And I agree with someone else who said after watching you, I did my 20's all wrong!

To my singing partner who didn't even know if she should start the challenge because of injury, but did it anyway: Just like in St. Louis, you remind me to never judge anyone by their size.  How you carry the heavy shit you do is beyond me, but when I grow up, I wanna be like you!

Finally, even though I said I wasn't going to mention any names, Patrick Jessee:  You kicked cancer's ass and came back stronger.  You protect the public as a firefighter and paramedic and have never backed away from a challenge.  You are a true hero, and I'm proud to call you a friend and humbled that you consider me one.

Now for the lessons...

Never Quit.  This class finished with a 100% pass rate.  We started together and we finished together.  Even when things were cold, dark, and hard.  Even when those demons got into our heads and made us question it, we beat them back.  We met, marched with and had our class picture taken with at least three cancer survivors.  Patrick, who I've already mentioned, and the boy and girl of the year for LLS.  Frankie, who lost his sight as a result of this disease, and Piper, who suffered and endured over 700 chemo treatments.  They never quit.  There is always good on the other side of bad.  Sometimes we just have to "embrace the suck".

GRC 936 with Piper and Frankie

Live life with no regrets.  We are owed nothing.  We have no idea how much time we are given on this earth.  Make the most of every day.  I saw it lived in the cancer survivors, and with every member of class 936.  If we wait for the perfect time to do what we dream of, we may never get the chance.  Lorrin L. Lee said it this way. " Your life is your message to the world. Make it inspiring."

A last thank you to Cadre "Big Daddy" John.  Excellent job and incredible challenge.  Much respect for you and what you do.  The story you shared in the frozen mud made us all want to be better Americans.  In one emotional story, you drove home both lessons.  The Marine you lost never quit, and I'm sure had no regrets.  His message, and yours are inspiring.

And to the entire GORUCK Community, until next time...

Sometimes you need a reminder

Let me start by saying this blog post has a prerequisite.  If you didn't read my report from the GORUCK Challenge, please do so now. Here's the link: GORUCK Challenge - Wining Hearts and Minds

Really, go read it... I'll wait.

OK, done?  Good. That experience was one of the most incredible experiences I've had, so I wanted to share it. I wanted to share it with people I think can use it, and will understand it.  My children.  So when I decided to do the custom GORUCK Challenge in Chicago on St. Patrick's Day Weekend, I decided to see if it would be possible to get any of my kids there to shadow.  More on that in a minute.

I want to take a moment to explain why I decided on this GRC.  In my first GORUCK Challenge, (which you've all read about) I met an incredible person that I now call a friend, Patrick Jessee, a Chicago paramedic and firefighter.  During that challenge I learned that in 2011 he was diagnosed with non Hodgkins Lymphoma.  Blood cancer.  He underwent six months of chemotherapy, and is now in remission. As some of you know, I am a cycling coach for Team in Training (the endurance training part of the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society) and his story resonated with me.  Patrick is now a candidate for the 2014 Leukemia & Lymphoma Society Man of the Year.  He decided to organize a custom GORUCK Challenge as a fundraiser for LLS.  I knew immediately that I'd be in and recruited a few others to go too.

Patrick Jessee-Chicago Fire Department  and Lymphoma Survivor

Back to my kids... I want them to experience GORUCK and see what it's like to depend on others for success and have them depend on you.  I want them to witness a group of people that focus on the mission and getting the job done, and don't worry about themselves individually.  I want them not only to do things that make them better, but to become better people.  They live on the Alabama Gulf Coast.  Of my four children, I could make it work for two of them to do it.  Logan, 16 years old on Ruck Day, and Julianne who will be 18.  I told them both that registration was $150 and that if they really wanted to do it, that I would fly them up to shadow it IF they raised $150 for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  I wanted them to have some skin in the game.  To take some ownership, and be a part of something that was greater than themselves.  They agreed and I bought plane tickets.

So today, I'm talking to Logan about how he shouldn't worry, he'll pass out before he dies.  How I talked to the Cadre, Lou, and gave him permission to do whatever is necessary to keep him in line.  General motivation.  Then I asked him how his fundraising was coming.  He told me that he had already raised about half of it.  $70.  I was feeling pretty proud of him and told him that was a great job.  That's when he did it.  He called me out.  A very simple, sincere question.  "So, dad, how about you? How much have you raised?"

Yeah.  I had no answer.  What am I supposed to say?  I paid my registration fee? That wasn't part of the deal?

Right then it hit me.  I shouldn't ask him to do something I won't do.  Lead by example.  I felt ashamed that I hadn't considered it before, but he was right. And I told him so.  So, I'm fundraising for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society.  Those of you that know me know that this is not the first time that I have raised money to fight blood cancers.  I've done it before as part of Team in Training.  This is different.  There is no minimum.  No incentives other than setting a good example, and doing the right thing.  So, I'm asking for your help.  Anything you can give.  $5 to $500. $1 to $1000.

You can write a check to the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society and mail it to me at this address: 

Bo Lackey
1331 South St. #11
Madison, WI 53715

You can send me money via paypal at sgtjhlackey@gmail.com. Retweet the link, post it on facebook, email it to anyone and everyone.   This isn't a competition between me and my kids.  The total raised will go in one envelope and given to Patrick Jessee at the GORUCK Challenge for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. We do GORUCK as a team, we fundraise as a team.  No individual involved, only completing the mission. 

I will also challenge everyone doing the Custom GORUCK to do the same thing.  No set amount, no suggested minimum.  Just bring an additional donation to the Challenge start.  Whatever you're able to do.  If you can raise more, bring more.  Let's all punch cancer in the throat.  Who's in?

And Logan...thanks for the reminder. 

The Obligatory New Years Resolution Post

The title of this one should say it all.  I'll try not to take up too much time, but wanted to share a thought or two. 

2013 was pretty cool.  In addition to Escaping from Alcatraz, PR'ing a Half Ironman, and finishing the Chicago Marathon, I also got the opportunity with Team in Training to Coach for the first time (amazing experience), visit Europe for the first time (seriously broadened my horizons and made me realize the world is a really small place), and really test my limits with a team doing my first GORUCK Challenge and learned I'm stronger than I ever imagined and that things can always be worse. I also registered for Yoga Life and Teacher Training with Yoga Shelter to take place in Mexico this spring.  All in all one of the best years of my life at 43 years old.

So, I started thinking, what do I want to do in 2014? What should make my list of resolutions and things to accomplish this year?  I've been mulling this over for a while now, and today it finally hit me.  There is only one thing I want to accomplish.  Only one resolution, and it's really pretty simple.

I want to be kinder to myself.

This year I resolve to be my own best friend.  If other people talked to me the way I talk to myself, how long would I let them stay in my life?  Probably not very long.  I am my own worst critic.  This year I will talk to myself more positive and less negative.

I resolve to spend time with the right people.  People who lift me up, not tear me down.  Not only the people I want to be with, but the people that want to be with me. They are the ones that usually see my worth more than I do.

I resolve to stop feeling sorry for myself. Sometimes bad or sad things happen for a reason.  Sometimes there is no reason. Either way, feeling sorry for myself never solves the problem or helps the situation.

I resolve to encourage myself.  To do things I never thought I could, to try new things that will broaden my horizons.  To believe in myself.

Ahimsa.  It is a term that basically means "do not injure"  It is a philosophy of non violence in word, thought and deed.  That sounds like a very noble cause.  But it has to start from within. My resolution is to make sure that my words, thoughts and deeds are kind to me.

Simple, right?  Simple isn't always easy.  Happy 2014 everyone!  Make it great!

Leaders, Warriors and Sheepdogs

Today is Veteran's Day. It is a day for us to thank every man and woman who ever donned the military uniform of this country.  It's not for those who died.  We have Memorial Day for that.  This is a day for us to thank every Veteran who ever served.  In peace time or in war, in battle or in an office, those who won decorations for valor, and those who never saw a shot fired in anger or ever deployed.  It doesn't matter their branch of service, length of service, rate or rank.  Because every single one of them just by the act of wearing the uniform said "I am willing to give my life for my country and her citizens."

This is a good day to explore the topics of "Leaders, Warriors and Sheepdogs".  A lot of you reading this probably have no idea what I'm talking about.  Read on.

We all have our battles to face.  In our work lives, our personal lives, our family lives and our athletic lives.  Whenever we have something to fight or conquer, we refer to it as war.  And I think that's ok.  I believe WAR is an acronym for We Are Ready. The problem is we are not all warriors. But, we all have the ability to become warriors.  Inside all of us beats the heart of a warrior. I believe we owe it to ourselves and those around us to find that warrior heart.  When you find it, you will become a leader, because all true warriors are leaders.

You may ask yourself  how am I qualified to talk about warriors and leaders. I believe I am a warrior.  I am a Veteran of the United States Navy, and then spent 20 years in law enforcement wearing the uniform of a Sergeant with the Mobile County, Alabama Sheriff's Office. Throughout my life I have learned to become a leader.  I believe I have learned how to motivate people, how to inspire them. I have also learned that we all have enemies both literal and figurative, and I have learned how to destroy and crush my enemies, tempered with mercy with necessary. What follows is what I have learned, and what I believe.

war·ri·or

–noun

1. One who is engaged in or experienced in battle.

2. One who is engaged aggressively or energetically in an activity, cause, or conflict

Throughout history, all societies have had a warrior class, and by necessity, all warriors classes have a code.  This is the only thing that separates the protectors from the predators. History shows that there are basically  ten primary characteristics that all warriors possess and that are a part of the "warrior's code".

• Self-Discipline
• Wisdom
• Courage
• Faith
• Honor 
• Virtue
• Mercy 
• Compassion
• Purity of Heart
• Freedom of Spirit 

 Why are warriors special people?  Because they use develop and use these qualities in the service of others.  If you want to become a warrior, these are the qualities you must cultivate.

 

Dragons

A warrior's worst enemy is dragons.  Dragons are those things that harm us, the suck our strength and energy.  Dragons are incredibly powerful and deceptive.  They include things like alcohol, drugs, greed, malice, and negative thinking. A warrior must always be on guard against these things.

I can not overemphasize the power of dragons and how important it is to stay strong and fight against them.  The consequences of dragons can be debt, depression, divorce and even suicide.  Over the course of my career, three of my friends and brothers in law enforcement took their own life because they could no longer battle these dragons.  Today, on Veterans Day, take in this sobering fact: data shows that at least 22 veterans a day commit suicide.  Every 65 minutes a warrior takes his own life. http://www.cnn.com/2013/09/21/us/22-veteran-suicides-a-day/  This is a fact that is completely unacceptable.  As a warrior, how can we fight these dragons?  What must we do to protect ourselves?

 

Armor

In order to protect ourselves, so we can serve others, we must wear our armor.  Just as warriors on the battlefield have bullet proof vests and ballistic shields, we must have our own emotional armor.  By this, I mean those things that make us happy and sustain our body, mind and spirit. These can include exercise, humor, education and faith.  But love is the most impenetrable armor.  Love from others, and our own love of self.  As warriors, we often think that we are too strong, or we can handle tings on our own.  The statistics tell us otherwise.  I heard someone say one time "An idiot knows how strong he is.  It takes a genius to know how weak he is."  If you need help, reach out for it.  There are so many people that are so deep into battling their own dragons, that they can't even see the depths to which they have sunk.

In addition to becoming warriors, we must also become what I call "Warrior Guardians". A true Warrior-Guardian is one who helps others walking the path in their search for life, health, knowledge, wisdom, virtue and love. We must be prepared to identify and assist those "shooting stars".  Those bright and promising warriors who are in danger of burning out.  We must be there for each other.  To help, support, listen, guide and lean on.  

It doesn't matter if you are a member of the armed forces,  in law enforcement, a fire fighter or EMT.  You could be a teacher, coach or parent.  You could work in an office, a warehouse, a delivery truck, or a department store.  If you believe in a cause, if you are ready to take up the flag and lead the way, then you are a warrior.

Said another way... It never gets easier, you just get better.
 

Sheep, Wolves, and Sheepdogs

Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, a former Army Ranger and West Point psychology professor theorizes that there are three types of people in the world, sheep, wolves, and sheepdogs.  In his theory, most people are sheep.  He doesn't mean this in a bad way at all, simply that the majority of the population are kind, good and peace loving, and would never consider doing harm to anyone.  Wolves are predators.  They feed on the sheep without mercy.  They are evil people capable of evil deeds.  Then you have the sheepdogs.  Sheepdogs protect the flock, yet would never hurt them.  They are capable of violence, but use their power for good, not evil.  Most people consider the sheepdogs our military, law enforcement and first responders.  But that is not necessarily the truth.  We all have the capability and duty to be sheepdogs.  How so?

First and foremost, a term called "situational awareness".  Know your surroundings.  Often times, wolves are able to prey on the sheep because no one is paying attention.  Smart phones, ipods, tablets, laptops, etc.all mean we can be completely unaware of what is happening around us.  We can get buried in music, e-mail, text messages and funny cat videos that we don't even see bad guys.  I am NOT advocating getting involved in a violent situation or trying to stop something that is already happening. NEVER do anything outside your training and comfort level.  But you can and should be aware.  Be in the moment, and know what is happening around you.  If nothing else, be a good witness.  Usually though, if the wolves see people paying attention and alert, they will move on to find other victims.

As a Veterans Day wrap up, thank a Vet for their service, cultivate in yourself the traits of a warrior and leader, and become a sheepdog. Now, go out and win the hearts and minds of others.

Take what the day gives you

My Chicago Marathon results and report.

Sigh.  I've waited to do this to see how I was ultimately going to feel about it. Put a little distance between me and the marathon to gain perspective.  I won't leave you in suspense.  I finished.  That's what I can say.  I did not come close to making my goal, and it wasn't pretty, but I finished. I walked away from the finish line with two thoughts, and both of those are still intact 17 days later.  1.  I'm glad I did it, and b. I'm glad I never have to do it again.

Here are the numbers: 40,230 runners from all 50 states and 120 countries, 1 million spectators, 29 neighborhoods.  My time: 5 hours and 18 minutes.

Obviously way off my stated goal of 4:37. When I finished, I was not happy.  I was tired, sore, and generally disappointed with my performance. If you're interested, here's the story...

Once in Chicago, me and my Team in Training teammates headed to McCormick Place for packet pick up and the race expo.  Everything went smooth there and after getting my race bib and shirt and checking out the largest race expo I've ever attended, we headed back to the hotel. Rest and relaxation was on the schedule for a while until meeting up with my other teammates on "Team Jenny" and heading out to Tim and Caroline Carey's place close to Wrigley Field. I cannot say enough about these guys.  Even though this was the first time I had actually met them, I felt like I knew them from facebook, the 100 day burpee challenge group, and from their friendship with Jenny.  They were kind enough to host us with pizza, pasta and an amazing rooftop view.  It was an excellent way to spend the evening before the marathon.  Thanks so much guys!  If you'd like, feel free to follow them on their blog "Keep Calm and Carey On" here: http://www.thetimmyboytimes.com/

Race morning we all met in the lobby. First with my TNT teammates:

Team in Training Wisconsin

Then with my Team Jenny teammates:

Team Jenny

We started moving over to the start area, passing through security, and over to the corrals where over 40,000 are nervously waiting.  We passed by an area of dried red paint on the sidewalk and someone mentioned it looked like a crime scene.  The following photo op ensued:

Marathons are NOT for everyone!

Now that the humor was out of the way, it was time to get down to business.  The race starts and at first it's tough to navigate with all the people, but the spectators are amazing. First few miles go by and I'm averaging about 9:20 miles based on the watch of a teammate I'm running with.  Faster than I was thinking, but not crazy.  So far so good.  I pull off the course just after mile three to use the facilities and from then on, I'm on my own.  We head north towards Wrigleyville and in what is probably one of the coolest moments of the race for me, we pass a nursing/retirement home.  I look up in the windows and see so many older people at the windows looking down, waving, and cheering us on.   A lot of waves back, and I'm feeling good.

We make the turn back south, and the crowds are still amazing, and it's still fun.  At just past mile 8 I start to feel a pain on the outside of my left knee.  Not bad, but noticeable.  And it's a pain I have never felt before.  I stop about mile 9 to use the port-a-potty again, and when I'm done, I feel no pain.  I'm thinking "Great! A little resting it now and then and I'm golden!"  At this point, I have no clue what my pace is because I don't have a watch, but quick calculations at mile markers put me around 10 minute miles, give or take.

Make it back into downtown, and cross the river yet again, and pass the 13.1 mark.  Halfway done.  Starting to feel the knee pain again, but managing it with walking breaks. I didn't know it at the time, but this was the beginning of the end of my good day and fun. In my opinion, the second half of the course it not as scenic or fun as the first half.  The course heads west, then to Chicago's south side.  It has its moments.  The  Hispanic flavor of the Pilsen neighborhood with mariachi bands and sombreros is pretty awesome, and Chinatown is pretty cool too.  Other than that, it's not enjoyable, and it becomes more industrial and paralleling a freeway until you get to U.S. Cellular Field where the White Sox play.

At this point, I'm hurting.  Walk breaks have become more and more frequent, and the knee pain, which I have figured out is my IT band, makes it painful to run much at all.  I'm thinking that for my marathon aspirations, doing the Go Ruck Challenge two weeks before the marathon may not have been the best scheduling plan, but hey... "It could always be worse!"

So, I make the turn at the ball park and head over the freeway.  I can see downtown and have an idea how far I still have to go.   I'm prepared to start heading towards the tall buildings, but...NO! Over the freeway we turn right and continue heading away from downtown and the finish line. It's only for a couple of blocks, but mentally, it's a killer.  I'm just past mile 23, and all I want to do is finish.  I don't remember ever feeling this bad before.  I'm physically in pain, my goal is all shot to hell, and all I can do is keep moving forward. I pass the mile 25 sign, then the one mile to go sign.  I get down to 800 meters then 400 meters.  I start to realize that it's really almost over.  I'm actually going to finish and be a marathoner.  Only a right turn and left turn still to go.  After the right turn is the only significant elevation gain on the course (how cruel is that?), then a quick left turn and I can see the finish line.  I cross in 5:18.  41 minutes after my goal time. I find one of the medical personnel and make sure they know what I'm about to do is on purpose (I learned this lesson at Escape from Alcatraz) and I dropped to do my burpee. I get my medal, and actually have to hurry back to the hotel to change and get a cab, because I have tickets to see Arlo Guthrie at the Old Town School of Folk Music and because of my (self believed) sub par performance, I have to hurry.

I'm pretty sure I was the only one at the Arlo Guthrie show with a Chicago Marathon Medal, and the show was amazing.  If you ever get the chance to see him, don't pass it up!  He's an outstanding musician and amazing storyteller!

Arlo Guthrie singing "Alabama Bound"

For the rest of the day and part of the following day I am upset, disappointed, and overall just not happy with the way the marathon went.  I mentor and coach endurance athletes, and they often ask for my advice on race day.  This is what I always tell them. "Train well, mentally prepare, and do everything possible to set yourself up for success.  But remember, things happen. No matter what, have fun and take what the day gives you."  Funny how it's so hard to follow your own advice, isn't it? I mean, I just finished the Chicago Marathon.  One of the six major marathons in the world.  A distance most people will never attempt or have no desire to.  I'm healthy, fit, and have a Chicago Marathon Medal and will always be a marathoner, and I'm depressed because I failed to cross the finish line before some arbitrary self imposed time?  I did the best I could on that day.  I had fun (mostly), and can cross it off my list.  I have no right to be upset.  And as if I needed confirmation, I see this story, of a man with muscular dystrophy that took 17 hours to finish the same Chicago Marathon I did. http://www.nbcchicago.com/news/sports/maickel-melamed-chicago-marathon-227642901.html And I'm unhappy with 5:18?  Kinda puts things in perspective.

Here's what it all comes down to: I had a great year filled with amazing events like Escape from Alcatraz, America's Most Beautiful Bike Ride, Ragnar, GORUCK Challenge, Superior Man Triathlon and the Chicago Marathon. Finishing any one of those events would be a successful year, and I did them all.  I'm really pretty lucky.

Before the Chicago Marathon, I though this link was humorous.  After?  It's downright HILARIOUS!

http://www.buzzfeed.com/video/kevinmcshane/the-8-stages-of-running-a-marathon

Final thoughts on the Chicago Marathon. A.  I'm really glad I did it! and 2.  I'm really glad I never have to do it again!  Will I want to? That may be a different story one day.  But not today.

Is fear my friend?

It's race week again and time for the dreaded taper.  I wrote a post earlier this year before Escape from Alcatraz that I titled "Let Go or Be Dragged".  Feel free to go back and read it here:  http://motivationninja.blogspot.com/2013_02_01_archive.html  A lot of the same feelings are creeping in now.  The Chicago Marathon is Sunday and I had my last run last night. I have to be honest people, I am really sweating this race.  I am worried and I am scared.  This will be my first marathon (yeah, yeah, I know..but I'm telling you Ironman does NOT count!).

My longest run is 18 miles, and my long runs in general have been painful.  For those of you that are facebook friends or follow me on twitter (@MotivationNinja feel free to follow me) you remember after 16 miles I said "Marathons are stupid. That is all." That run hurt, and I was completely prepared to say "screw it" right then.  And I have to run 10.2 more than that. I'm not sure I'm prepared, I'm not sure I can actually run 26.2 miles all at once and I'm unable to let go.  This week I am being dragged.

I added to my own stress by imposing a time goal to meet.  I shouldn't have done it, and it's not smart, especially for my first marathon, but somehow I couldn't help it.  Now I'm sure everyone wants to know what that time goal is.  So, why not add even more pressure and put it out there for anyone who doesn't already know.  4:36:59.  Yeah, it seems like an odd number.  I read somewhere recently that the average US marathon time last year was 4 hours and 37 minutes.. That's an average pace of 10:34 per mile.  I know that on my 18 mile run, I averaged a 10:06 mile pace, so I figured, "Hey...that's doable!  I just want to be better than average!" Why?  I have no idea.  It makes no difference at the end of the day, and I'll get the same medal no matter when I finish.  I'm nowhere near fast enough to worry about placing in my age group, especially in what was the largest marathon in the world last year! But, that's what my mind does to me. So now, I get to sit here not only worried about finishing, but finishing in a certain time.

The one "redeeming" factor for this marathon is why I chose to do it.  Many of you know that we lost a friend and training partner in January when she was murdered by her soon to be ex-husband.  Some of us have dedicated out entire race season to Jenny by wearing pink compression socks at every race.  And several of us decided to run the Chicago Marathon this year for her.  She ran it last year and it was her last race. We even had shirts made.  Her nickname was "Peanut" and her favorite color was orange, so...

Anyway, wish me luck. If for any reason you want to follow this train wreck, here's a link that should help. https://register.athletetracking.net/bacm/index.html  My bib number is 49440.  You can choose to get updates to your phone, facebook, or twitter.  Go ahead, buy into the fear with me. It's gonna be great.

Gulp.

Go Ruck Challenge - Winning Hearts and Minds

This past weekend, I completed my first GoRuck Challenge. If you don't know what that is, I'll try and sum it up for you.  Take a backpack (aka Ruck), add six bricks to it.  Show up at a predetermined location at 1 am.  Take about 25 other people that you've never met before, throw in one or two combat experienced military Special Forces operators (your Cadre), and prepare for the unknown for the next 8-10 hours and 15-20 miles (that's a minimum.  Under promise, over deliver.)

In this case, the city was St, Louis, MO.  The start point was the Art Museum at Forest Park.  The Cadre were Cadre Bert and Cadre Brad.  The details, well, we'll leave those out.  Every challenge is different, and to understand it, you need to experience it.  I'll tell you we bear crawled, flutter kicked, duck walked, did push ups,  carried logs, chairs, each other, and more weight than you even want to think about. We got hot, wet, tired, and sore.  We went 17-19 miles over 12 hours.  But we started with 25 people and we ended with 25 people.  We started as individuals and finished as a team.

It was definitely one of the hardest things I've ever done.  It was also one of the most satisfying.  If you've ever wanted to know what it is like to put your trust and faith into other people, this is for you.  If you've ever wanted to know what a true sense of camaraderie is, this is for you.  If you've ever wanted to know what it's like to depend on other people, and have those people depend on you to be successful, this is for you.

It was an honor and a privilege to spend a few hours with the other members of Class 792 and Cadre Bert and Brad.  There were lessons taught that I will take with me throughout my life, and try to pass them on to the people I train and coach with Team in Training.  Some of those lessons include:

"It could always be worse". Your feet are sore, and you have blisters? At least you have shoes. You're doing more push ups, bear crawls and flutter kicks than you ever thought possible? At least its not raining or snowing. You're carrying your ruck, someone else's ruck because they're injured, you have the team weight and it hurts to move, but you still have miles to go? At least you're not getting shot at. It can always be worse.

"Winning the hearts and minds of others." That's our job.  As Cadre Bert explained, Special Forces are nothing more than the Peace Corps with guns.  Their mission is not to kill people.  It's to win hearts and minds.  That's what we should all aspire to in our daily lives.  Not win by brute force, but by winning over hearts and minds.  At one point during the challenge, we noticed a person down in a grocery store parking lot.  Cadre Bert went to them, stayed with them until paramedics arrived, and left the class to go to the hospital with this elderly person who lived alone and had a birthday the next day.  I promise you, Cadre Bert won over hearts and minds.  As we're walking through the streets, carrying a teammate in a discarded chair that Cadre Brad decided was necessary to complete our mission, being led by an American Flag and we see a man get out of his car and stand with his hat over his heart as we pass by, that's winning hearts and minds.

"Embrace the Suck." Things aren't always easy.  There are times when you have to dig deep and go to a dark place to finish what you started.  Vince Lombardi said it this way,  “The real glory is being knocked to your knees and then coming back. That's real glory. That's the essence of it.”  Let me tell you, we got knocked to our knees.  But finishing in the face of challenge and adversity.  Finishing as a team.  That was the real glory.

"If you ever think, 'this isn't so bad', you're doing something wrong. Because I promise you one of your teammates is having the hardest time of their life.  You should be taking on more to help them."  Cadre Bert said this early on.  It's not about doing your "fair share".  It's about doing whatever is necessary to complete the mission.  Stronger people take on more weight.  That's life.  Deal with it.  To quote my Captain with the Mobile County Sheriff's Office, Bruce Lee, "Life isn't fair.  A fair's where you go to eat cotton candy and ride the tilt-a whirl." Work to your abilities, whatever they may be.  The important thing is completing the mission.

People have asked "Was the GoRuck Challenge fun?" My answer "Hell no!" Something like this can never be described as fun.  It is however one of the most satisfying experiences of my life, and well worth it.  I'm proud to be GoRuck Tough.  

I'll finish with something Cadre Bert said at the start. "Marathons, lifting weights, triathlons, those all make people better.  We're here to make better people."  Thank You Cadre.  I get it.